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A Miscellany 37
Comments on the Church Calendar

by David Marjanović

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Re: The Church Calendar

Weekly Day of Apathetic Agnostic Observance: The Church has selected Monday. No other major religion is using it, and it *is* the day about which people are most apathetic.

Fine -- but what observance???

I sincerely propose the addition of April 1st. The reason is simple -- over most of the Western world, this day is celebrated _for a purely secular reason_. So far I haven't even found an attempt to identify a religious origin.

21 April: Doesn't this rather come out of nowhere? Does anyone need it? Why should young people especially... ~:-|

31 October: The text for Halloween is atheistic, not agnosticist. The successful secularization of the holiday -- who still celebrates Sámhain? -- is of course a good reason to keep it in the calendar.

21 December: What's the point?

25 December: Don't make up a barely funny word like "Agnostimas". Yuck.

What about:

24 and 25 December: Kurisumasu -- the Japanese celebration of rampant consumerism. A good opportunity to buy more than you need and to exchange the surpluses with your friends and relatives in a spirit of deep generousness (and striking kitsch), just for the fun of it. However, we won't object if any traditionalists prefer to devote the day to its original purpose -- the worship of Mithras.

The word "Kurisumasu" is of course a desperate attempt to render English "Christmas" in Japanese syllables. But so what!!! The vast majority of Japanese has never heard of any religious connection to that day (which is a normal working day in Japan, of course).

Heidentag is Heathen_s'_ Day, not just one heathen_'s_. But anyway... it is a religious holiday, albeit for dozens of different religions together. I don't quite see what we have in common with those who try to believe in Celtic or Germanic gods or with those who deify various aspects of nature.

28 December: We might wish to abstain from that one. In Spain this day is used instead of April 1st. Whoever falls for a joke is an inocente -- as ignorant and stupid as the innocent children that were mowed down on that day. So... it's like April 1, but with religious overtones, even though rather perverted ones.


10 July 2005